i'm so proud of you

californstar:

My anaconda don’t wanna go to class tomorrow

terminallycheesy:

forfuturereferenceonly:

ohio-is4-lovers:

a christmas themed porn movie called “it’s beginning to look a lot like fistmas

Really tumblr? A fucking “joke” about a religious holiday celebrated by billions in the world? It’s really disrespectful. Also glorification of porn? Not only it displays submissive/dominant interactions in sexual exchange, it also underrepresents asexual individuals. 

Looks like someone didn’t get any fistmas presents this year.

imthehomoyourmomwarnedyouabout:

motherfuckingdragonsyo:

I made an old lady blush today at work because she ordered two senior coffees and I said “SENIOR ? I’m sorry miss, i’m going to have to ask to see some ID.” and she covered her mouth and went “Oh dear me” and couldn’t stop smiling

Bless your soul

foreveralone-lyguy:

Fuck off Tim

my-dads-the-king-of-hell:

my-dads-the-king-of-hell:

so apparently an arm can sell on the black market for $885, ($500 for the shoulder plus $385 for the hand an forearm) 

and a leg can sell for $500 (at least thats the lowest price of an albino leg so im guessing here) 

So when someone says “That’ll cost an arm ad a leg” they are roughly asking for $1,335

which is less than i would have guessed. 

i didn’t spend this much time researching the cost of limbs on the black market for one note

diamond-thumbprints:

This is the end of it all

Long Exposure of an Airliner Lifting Off
sickfromtoxic:

 

damianmcgintleman:

frenearden:

The only thing funnier than a pun is the look of utter disappointment, hatred, and/or disbelief from the people around you

image

Promises used to mean the world to me but I’ve been making fake ones left and right since I’ve met you

deoxyhemoglobin:

I was chatting with a donor before I drew his blood, and he was a dentist. when I actually drew him, there was just a little squirt of blood and it surprised him

I looked him in the eye and told him “you’re bleeding because you don’t floss”

and he went dead silent

Leave 😔😔😔😔

How many more guys am I gonna start to like then stop once they actually are interested in me lmao

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